Paternity, Fraternity, Equality - Chapter 1The sun's kiss left him limp and wet. His eyes stared blankly out from under blond bangs plastered to his forehead. The formerly iced tea resting on the grass beside the lounge was now weak and tepid. One lone sliver of ice floated on top of the light brown sea. It faded away in the glare. Soft puffy clouds slid across the sky's brilliantly blue background. Far in the distance birds swirled and dived. He didn't see them. He didn't see the clouds.
He was lost in memories as his skin slowly turned from a soft burnished brown to a rusty red. Every moment from those days was etched in his mind, never to be forgotten. It was enough. He didn't want more out of life. Not right now.
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Perry figured the few episodes of boyhood mutual masturbation back in high school were just the typical acts of a typical guy. He'd felt a thrill touching and being touched. But that same thrill, or something close to it, came with his first conquest of a girl and continued as he proved his manhood to himself and his peers. He fell in love with Jan his senior year at State. They married. They had a family. Perry settled into the expected and fulfilling role of husband, father, breadwinner.
Jan had been pregnant when they graduated. The twins arrived just months after Perry started his climb up the middle class ladder of success. Their sister arrived fifteen months later. Jan became an Earth mother. Perry worked even harder. He gave his family everything they needed -- except himself. Nothing untypical for a workaholic who saw himself defined by his success and his family -- his well dressed, well housed, well mannered family.
Things started unraveling when Beth died. Just thirteen she stepped off the school bus and was thrown across the road by the impact of a car driven by a teenager high on pot. Jan never accepted what had happened. Every day the boys and Perry had more to do as the woman they had grown to depend upon for everything slowly crumbled into a dark hole of depression and unreasonable guilt. With agreement from her parents Perry finally had to institutionalize her.
Now he was the sole adult responsible for the care and feeding of two high spirited fourteen year olds. They resented him, blamed him for not being there when their mother had needed him; blamed him for taking her away; refused in only ways a teen age mind could devise to accept his authority. What made it worse was he had been so tied up with working he still frequently couldn't tell Tim from Tom or Tom from Tim, whichever was which.
Added to all the turmoil in Perry's life during that year was finding himself attracted to his new associate at work. They were quick friends, then pals. He was instantly comfortable with Matt talking about his problems at home. Matt was a good listener, never tried to push his opinion of what should or shouldn't be done. It became a ritual to swap rides. Matt lived within three miles of Perry. After the first month of ride sharing they were into a routine of Matt stopping when he drove and helping out however he could for an hour or two, even if it was just to pick up after the boys.
Perry wasn't sure when he knew what he was feeling for Matt was more than just a male bonding thing. He visited Jan at least twice a week but found himself unable to ask Matt to go with him. He knew Jan wouldn't say anything, wouldn't even notice. She seldom even acknowledge his visits. Still he felt uncomfortable even considering them meeting. When the dreams started he wasn't surprised.
At first they were just abstract mixing of the past and a future he was sure he'd never experience. Hands, dicks, stroking, him and his high school buddy that transfigured into Matt and back. He frequently woke in the middle of the night with the dream vivid, his cock hard and a tightness in his gut that had only one way to be undone.
The night after Matt had stayed for dinner, actually fixing most of it while Perry monitored the boys through their homework, the dream was subtly different. No transformation. It was Matt right from the first. When Perry jerked awake he found he was already masturbating, must have been stroking along in his sleep with the images from his dream.
He thought he hid his feelings from Matt. There was no way Matt was 'that way'. Matt was just a good friend and Perry didn't want to loose that friendship. A few days later Matt offered to take the twins to the municipal pool and let Perry catch up on a work assignment. When he drove up to get the boys Perry went out with them to thank Matt. As the tow headed terrors piled into the convertible Perry stood halfway down the walk, frozen in his tracks. Matt had traversed the car and stood holding the door open and the passenger seat back forward wearing nothing but a brief pair of trunks and sandals.
It was the first time Perry had seen Matt without a suit. Sure he usually tossed the tie on the way home, had even taken off his shirt and helped clean out a clogged kitchen drain in his tee shirt once. But there he stood now, nearly nude, leaning in, talking to Tim and Tom. The fabric of the trunks molded tight across his butt. He was lightly tanned. The body revealed was trim and taunt with an aesthetic male beauty. Perry felt a jolt and squeezed his eyes shut.
When he opened his eyes Matt was striding up the walk, a grin on his face. Perry tried to keep his eyes on Matt's familiar face but they kept wandering, raking up and down. He knew he was blushing as he stammered his thanks while a tightness gripped his groin. Matt shrugged off the words of gratitude. Wrapping his arm around Perry's shoulder he gave him a hug.
"What are friends for, buddy. Glad I can help. Now get in there an' finish that report." With a parting shot at Perry's roiling stomach he turned. The three of them waved as they drove off.
Perry didn't move his feet but his cock was struggling, throbbing, pulsing inside his boxers, making his slacks bulge. His shoulder was tingling where Matt had held him. Except for a hand shake or two and the frequent tummy jabs that lightly connected it was the first time they had touched. His eyes closed again and the feel of that hug returned, burning into him.
Passing the den Perry moved down the hall. In the bathroom he neatly hung his clothes, ignoring his state of arousal. Under the shower, the water blasting ice, nothing happened. In a daze he slowly warmed up the temperature and began to soap himself. In his mind he felt Matt's hands not his own as they slid across his chest, rubbed the bar in his hair, worked lather up and down his legs. His erection hurt. His scrotum ached. He gave in to his need grasping himself with a handful of suds. Images of Matt, Matt without even the trunks, Matt stroking with him, Matt stroking him, filled his mind.
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